Matter, Energy, and Life of Michaela A. Castello.

Button-Fly Jeans


I have been searching for new pairs of jeans for a while now, a quest that yesterday brought me into H & M in Towson Mall (they have a pretty extensive men’s section compared to their other store instances I have encountered). Yet in the fitting room I was surprised and dismayed to discover that their jeans all have 5-button flies. Now, maybe having a button fly is some kind of statement of fashion, but I just don’t see how that works out on men’s pants. How is one supposed to “reboot” after taking a pee? I see the story playing out even now: A lone man, stranded at the urinal, fumbling. Instead of a tidy zipup-and-move-on, he is forced to have to secure fasteners, individually, in quintuplicate?

It seems to me like the designers took their female jeans and simply adapted them for men, leaving the vagina-friendly button fly in place. I was not pleased. I suppose it is something I could deal with if I liked the rest of the pants well enough, but it’s definitely a strike against. Given that the colors I wanted were unavailable in my size, I moved on, disappointed.


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